[Feature Request]: support setting the upper limit of off-heap memory

[aylei]

Is there an existing issue for the same feature request?

• [X] I have checked the existing issues.

Is your feature request related to a problem?

There is no limit in MO when allocating off-heap memory.

Describe the feature you'd like

Introduce an upper limit of off-heap memory, throttle allocation and/or reclaim memory when the upper limit reached.

The limit should be tunable at runtime without restarting MO process.

cc @xzxiong

Describe implementation you've considered

No response

Documentation, Adoption, Use Case, Migration Strategy

No response

Additional information

No response

[reusee]

不是所有堆外分配的场景，都可以做内存回收。内存缓存、可以spill的hashmap或者batch/vector，这些场景可以。I/O，网络传输这些不可以。

所以需要针对每个具体的场景，实现可以配置和控制的容量，没法对全局的分配量做限制。

[reusee]

实现伸缩，需要在使用堆外分配器的模块实现，不是在分配器内部。内存缓存容量控制、spill的逻辑，都不是在分配器实现的，没有统一的方法去实现的。

[reusee]

堆外内存不能控制上限，否则会出现死锁的问题。

[aylei]

off-heap memory is claimed by different consumers, track the memory limit implementation in these modules instead. e.g. https://github.com/matrixorigin/matrixone/issues/19414