[compiler] Add enableVerboseNoSetStateInEffect to suggest options to user/agent

[poteto]

The current validateNoSetStateInEffects error has potential false positives because we cannot fully statically detect patterns where calling setState in an effect is actually valid. This flag enableVerboseNoSetStateInEffect adds a verbose error mode that presents multiple possible use-cases, allowing an agent to reason about which fix is appropriate before acting:

1. Non-local derived data - suggests restructuring state ownership
2. Derived event pattern - suggests requesting an event callback from parent
3. Force update / external sync - suggests using useSyncExternalStore

This gives agents the context needed to make informed decisions rather than blindly applying a fix that may not be correct for the specific situation.