[BUG] Make memberlist use ips for routing

[HammadB]

Description of changes

Summarize the changes made by this PR.

• Improvements & Bug fixes
  • The memberlist uses k8s dns based routing for the stateful set. However, this can result in delays when the routing updates. This propagates the ip in the memberlist which is much faster.
  • This change is backwards compatible
    • CRDs fields are optional by default, so not setting the ip is fine if CRD is updated
    • CRD fields can be set in the code without the CRD being updated
    • The python frontend will use the ip if present, otherwise it falls back to the id
    • The go code will read the ip to "" anywhere it expects it to be set if the old version of the CR is used
• New functionality
  • ...

Test plan

How are these changes tested? Added a test which adds data to a collection, kills the query service pods and waits for them to be ready, simulating a roll out of sorts. Then it issues another query and make sure the query succeeds with updated routing. Before this change, this test failed.

• [x] Tests pass locally with pytest for python, yarn test for js, cargo test for rust

Documentation Changes

None